I spent five days without checking Facebook or Instagram last week.
It was a conscious effort, even though my thumb sometimes touched those notorious little squares on my iPhone screen without even thinking.
One of my new years intentions, was to log off more regularly.
Scrolling through social media, even though I often exercised self-control, was sometimes still too much of a distraction from living in my here and now.
It was distancing me from my family. And no matter how confident in myself I was feeling, how secure - it was always leaving me with the vague feeling that there was some area I still wasn't measuring up in.
Maybe it's just me?
But I needed a digital detox.
I need to set an example for my kids.
And I've written about this before and maybe everyone has now because it's working it's way into the fabric of our lives. Social media. Smart phones. And Ann Voskamp says it can be a soul meal - or it can be soul suicide.
And for too long I feel maybe little parts of my soul die when I don't make a conscious effort to put down that thing, and not let it put me down. When it has its grasp on me because it's an easy way to feel connected, or inspired.
But this week I've been Connecting with the ultimate Connector, and letting His breath Inspire.
This week instead of rolling over and letting my eyes unblur as I scroll Facebook, I've taken deep breaths. Rolled over. Felt the cool sheets as my feet stretched out to the corners. Listened to the birds, and run my fingers over the fluffy ginger purring thing curled up under my arm. Breathed in a prayer and breathed out His name.
This week I've taken photos of my kids, not to post or push or brag or boast. But because I've been in those moments and I've wanted to capture them.
I finished two books. I was attentive to everyone who spoke in my direction.
I watched as a new monstera leaf unfurled over the course of a couple of days - soft and light green. I unfurled too.
Social media can be soul food but it can make us feel starved of real love too.
And this week the break made me feel full.
I'll be logging off more often, to make sure the grip it has on me never gets too tight again.